like how can you love and heal somebody that keeps doin damge to you | hearing him apologize but remembering he attacks me or uses any personal things against me when we argue , how he laughs with his friends about breaking stuff i made for him , how he talks shi abt me and kinda makes them feel okay abt doin it too . & how he’s just a whole nother person when i’m not around & then tries to tell me he’s still in the right bc he ‘ loves me ‘ & still ‘ tried for me ‘ ..